Spread Trading

Corn construction creates claptrap

Date 4/6/2006 12:00 AM | Topic: Other

Football Betting Spread There is an old saying that goes, "People who live in houses made of corn shouldn't get hungry." Due to recent developments, the students, faculty and staff of Luther College ought to heed this sagest of aphorisms.

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Commodity Spread Trading According to a press release issued last week, the Luther College administration has initiated plans to renovate the on-campus health and fitness center in a most atypical manner.

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Nfl Betting Spread This health and fitness center, known as Legends, is to have its entire exterior covered in a layer of decorative corn rather than bricks.

But scientists from the University of California at Berkeley published studies last year saying they had found transgenic corn, also known as genetically modified corn, in the mountains of Oaxaca. The results from Berkeley have been challenged since then, though the scientists and local groups maintain that the mutated corn is still spreading in the Oaxaca Sierra. Genetically modified crops are plants spliced with foreign genes to help them resist drought and pests. No health risks have proved to be linked to the consumption of transgenic corn.

Advanced Commodity Spread Sound bizarre? Though unorthodox, the use of corn as the finishing material of a structure is not completely unheard of. It is a little-known fact that the designers of China's Great Wall originally considered building the impressive fortification out of corn. The Chinese then realized that corn doesn't grow in China.

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Betting Exchange Spread However, the most famous building to feature a façade of corn is the appropriately-named Corn Palace in Mitchell, S.D. Established in 1892, the Corn Palace is a landmark for travelers heading toward Wall Drug, The Badlands and Mount Rushmore.

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Stock Spread Trading Taking their cue from the designers of the Corn Palace, the Luther College administration has stated that the intention of decorating the exterior of the Legends fitness center with corn is to give the building a distinctly Midwestern charm.

Online Spread Betting The project will involve adorning the entire surface of the fitness center with over 1,400 bushels of multicolored corn.

Complete Guide Spread Trading Reportedly, on one face of the building, the ears will be arranged into a mural depicting a cubist perspective of Martin Luther's "95 Theses." Another face will feature a leather-clad George Washington, powdered wig and all, mounting a chromed-out Harley-Davidson and waving the American flag.

Betting Horse Racing Spread News of the unique renovation is causing quite a stir among the student body. "I thinks that having corn on the outside of that there building will be a right-welcome sight on campus," said Johnny McRedneck ('07). "If there's one thing that represents America perfectly, it's corn. Well, corn and chewing tobacco."

Low Spread Forex Trading Other students also show much interest in the idea.

Sport Spread Betting "Totally organic - like we're going to be one with nature," said Eric Lame-Hippie ('09). "The building will be made of the most pure construction materials: plants and love. With this project, we're just spreading the love, man."

Trading Spread And Seasonals Of course, not all students are as optimistic as McRedneck and Lame-Hippie.

Arbitrage Spread Trading "I don't understand why Luther would want the outside of one of their buildings made from corn. That can't be very weather-resistant," said Carrie Livgren ('06). "We're in Iowa where it storms and snows and sleets.

Betting Guide Insider Sports They will probably be replacing the corn exterior on a yearly basis."

Betting Spread Successful When asked to comment, Cornelius Bloomlove, the administrator in charge of the renovation project, said that he thinks a corn exterior will generate much-needed funds for the college.

College Football Betting "A building with a corn exterior is a very unique innovation. No other college or university in the United States has anything like it," said Bloomlove. "We've been throwing around the idea of having a corn-related addition to Luther College for some time now, and we're very excited to see the project finally realized. I truly believe it will attract many prospective students and could be the clinching factor for a student debating between Luther and another school."

Betting Financial Risk Spread "I'm confident that we will even draw tourists with our corn," Bloomlove concluded.

Betting Point Spread On Nfl With such excitement and positive anticipation from the Luther administration, it seems the corn-adorned Legends fitness center will indeed come to fruition.

Betting Point Spread Though the project may cause divisiveness in the student body, one thing seems certain. Luther College will finally be known as something other than "that one place where Dave Matthews played that one time." Looking on the bright side, if the project fails, the Caf administration won't have to pay for corn flakes for a long time.

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